You don’t need to change yourself to fit any beauty standard.
They want you to be insecure. When you feel unattractive, you’re easier to take advantage of. When you think your value is attached to how to fit a beauty standard, you feel like you need to have low standards because you don’t look “perfect.” Or, you spend all your time, money, and energy into the next beauty hack and painful physical transformation.
You don't need to do this. You are perfect just the way you are. The right way is the healthy way.
So do what they hate to see, and become more confident.
It's easier said than done, but there's good news...
You don’t have to feel confident to act confident.
Start doing this:
Don’t people please, start saying no when someone suggests something that is very inconvenient for you. Don't make up an excuse, just smile and tell them it doesn’t work for you. Put your needs first. Don’t attach your happiness to what other people think of you. Escape the trap of being the "nice" or the "easy" one.
Don’t judge others for how they look. When you use your words and thoughts to diminish the things that make others unique, you make it harder to appreciate the things that make you unique and attractive. The way you judge others is the way you judge yourself. Be kinder, not nicer.
Don’t speak negatively about yourself. Always use words that feel encouraging and empowering. Most people use their words to complain and point out what is wrong with life. This makes them feel disempowered and keeps them small. Use your words to talk about what you are available for. Use your words to point out what you're grateful for and what is going well in life. You don't need to complain just because they complain. Don’t focus on what isn’t perfect. Authentic imperfection is perfection.
You can never win when you ask others for permission. Even if you fit their exact standards, they will always find something else to criticize. Even if you’re born with beauty or wealth or even if you are able to grow into these things. It will never be enough for them. So.. validate yourself.
xoxo
patty
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